my mouth tastes like poor choices
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
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