so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
Randomize
