Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
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