did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
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