question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
Randomize
