please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
I tried to walk home in my heels. And I fell into a snow bank. And then I cried and a policeman came up to me and said I can't sit in a snowbank and got me a cab. So maybe that's where I left my credit card. I remember the cop asking me if I was old enough to drink, too. OMG. How embarrassing. Pretty sure I told him to "leave me alone."
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
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