I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
Made a vodka juice box out of a ziploc bag and a straw for when I drive. Doesn't count as an open beverage container anymore.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
