Alright folks.. i have made history - I just hit my 2nd PARKED car SOBER withing 6 months.. :*( wtf?!
My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
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