no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
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