As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
'valentine' just autocorrected to 'cake robe' in my phone
I think that summarizes my life up pretty accurately
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
Randomize
