i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
Randomize
