Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
I think I just saw someone hide a body.
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
My mom asked what the mark on my neck was - I told her I burned it with a straightener.
She believed that the monsterous hickey on your neck was a burn?
well, not really. but then i reminded her that my sister has yet to take that pregnancy test and she conviniently forgot about my hickey
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
The best thing about my promotion is that I now have an office with a door. I can take my naps in peace instead of leaning my head against the stall in the bathroom.
I can't believe they pay you six figures. I hate you.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
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