had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
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