TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
Farmville is her only friend.
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
Can someone please explain where the fish in the mason jar came from when we were at a bar all night?
You told the bartender if he gave you one of the fish you'd go away
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
Randomize
