NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
Dude, sorry for live texting you my binge drinking. If you'd like me to do the same for my hangover, I can share that I just had to sit down while q-tipping my ears.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
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