i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
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