I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
Send help, water and tortillas.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Randomize
