I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
It's an open bar. I'm gonna be gone when you get here.
Text me the address now before you're too drunk to text English.
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
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