My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
I got us kicked out of the bar because the waitress found me in the kitchen trying to make spaghetti
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
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