It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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