That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
I accidently shit my pants. So I tried to throw my underwear in their lake, but they floated. So in the middle of the night, I got into the paddle boat and had to throw a rock on top of them so they would sink. Next time, I just won't shit myself.
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
Randomize
