If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
Where are you guys?
Drunk
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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