Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
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