Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
Randomize
