i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
Randomize