And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
Randomize
