ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
So squirting runs in the family.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
Randomize
