I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
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