There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
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She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
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We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
i just wrote an ode to an enchilada dorito. i'll need that pregnancy test now please.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
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