you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
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