Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
My ex is stopping by while he’s working tonight after delivering a pizza to fuck me, then going back to work at Pizza Hut. This is what my life has become.
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