finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
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