i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
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