if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
You ruined the universe
Randomize
