i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
Randomize
