you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Found half of a five day old piece of pizza behind my dresser. Apparently it was drunkenly set there and got knocked down. It was such a happy reminder of last weekend.
I found a cheeseburger next to my tub once. It's there to shame you, but it always just makes me feel more awesome.
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
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