It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
Sexting Captain while emailing my eharmony match about my low key weekend is hard.
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
Randomize
