He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
We talked him into tasing himself.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
Randomize
