Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
Randomize
