there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
Randomize