yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
Randomize
