the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
This beer is not sobering me up at all
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
The shit I just took was my body's way of telling me bourbon and mixed nuts aren't an appropriate dinner. Well played, colon. WELL. PLAYED.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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