forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
Randomize
