ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
Remember when I referred to my box of wine as my briefcase and made all of those stupid jokes about working overtime? Thanks for ignoring my cry for help.
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
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