i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
