I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask.
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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