Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm babysitting and we're watching Barney and I don't understand why Barney can magically make band hats appear but he makes them make shitty ass instruments.
Barney's a jerk
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
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