i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
I have feelings that need drinking.
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
