I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
I just took a condom out of my purse and opened it in front of my entire family because I thought it was a wetnap. Way too hungover for family brunch.
Randomize
