That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize
